I made a "quality of life" choice today. See, I work part-time at a "national coffee shot." (Don't know if I can use the name or not here ...) and it's a great job, terrific benefits, the money's OK (because I choose to work and don't have to, I'm a little more agreeable than some people I work with). Anyway, I really, really like my job .... but .... it seems like it's coming between what's "important," or at least what I say is important.

I'm all about actually trying to live my life according to the things I say. If I say something is important to me, I try to make it important through the amount of time, energy and money I put into it. I really, really dislike people who have a good "party line," but in reality live their lives in opposition or even compromise to what their mouths say. I don't ever want to be a "good talker," and a mediocre live - er, you know?

Case in point: I am a home schooler. I know, instant pictures of freaks and geeks and religious Bible bangers come to mind. No, my family is not like that -- at all. In fact, most people (after knowing us for a while) will say, "I can't believe you home school ... You're kids are so ... normal." As if that's a compliment. Anyway, that conversation is for another day.

But I say my kids are the most important investment my husband and I have been given. No, not everyone should home school (again ... not the main point in this entry). I better be willing to live my life so that not only the "outside world" knows my kids are important, but THEY know they are important and a priority for me. If my paint's in good shape, but my infrastructure sucks, what's the point? (again -- another day's rant).

So, today I joined three friends I've worked with in the past at a camp. We do leadership training -- high ropes things, helping people overcome their fears by climbing 20-30 feet in the air and going through tasks they "think" they can't do, etc. Yeah, it's safe (they're constantly tethered to safety ropes), but the experience pushes most people way past their comfort zone, and helps them become people who CAN instead of people who wish they could. I went with my friends to get some sort of certification, which means I am making a commitment to be more involved with the camp again.

I love my coffee job -- really. And I'm pretty good at what I do, because I'm good with people and I love the product, and I am all about bringing the two together.

But nothing compares to helping people become what they never thought they could. To see a kid who spends most of his days on city streets that he fears reconize the beauty of a fresh, brisk autum day ... to hear a girl cry after completing a task and say, "I just wish my mom could see me right now ..." there is nothing like it in the world. To see a group of people helping each other accomplish something siginificant, rather than tearing each other a part because someone didn't do something stupid (like how we set up a certain thing at work). Those things matter to me. So I best show it with my life.

So my quality of life choice today is to reinvest my time with changing people's lives more than serving them coffee. Rather than getting up each day to make a little money, I want to get up each day expecting something different -- something that will matter weeks or months or years from now. I don't know exactly what that means yet (our family insurance is through my job, so we're working on finding something else), but I do know that I need to spend more time living life than worried about insignificant things or even financial decisions.

To be true to who I am, I must do that.